In this installment of Practical Magic, Lisa Stardust explores the art of the hands free orgasm through breathing. Always remember that magic is for believers, but this column can also simply serve as a guide to getting in touch with yourself — magically or not.
Orgasm hands free? Yes, it can be done. Many people have been able to attain climax through breathing exercises by giving energy to their seven chakras (also known as energy centers) that are located throughout the body. Activating these areas through breathwork can ignite the ability to climax and orgasm freely.
Ok, hands free might be pro-level, but you can also enhance your orgasms by breathing. Either way, it takes time and practice to incorporate the technique below into your life, but it can be done. By doing so, you can expand the dimensions of your experience and appreciation of your partner if you choose to do this with them. However, we will be focusing on exciting and delighting ourselves in this exercise. So, read on for information about orgasmic breathing.
See where your breath is at normally
Jessica O’Reilly, Ph.D., sexologist and founder of The Sexual Pro Series, told Self that many people instinctually hold their breath when they approach orgasm for any number of reasons, from excitement to fear to focus. While that might work for some, O’Reilly said that breathing is key to keeping blood flowing and enhancing your orgasm.
Next time you’re enjoying a little solo-sesh, check in on what your breath naturally does when you approach orgasm — no judgment, just observation. That way you can figure out if you want to keep things the same, or change them up.
Don’t ignore those tingles
Author and host of The Sex Ed Podcast, Liz Goldwyn talked about orgasmic breathing in an episode of her show, and advised that we start thinking about the way our genitals feel throughout the day. More often than not, we don’t pay attention to the little sensations, tingles, and chills that our genitals feel, which is a shame because those minor vibes and frequencies can hold and release a lot of energy. Meditation and breathing techniques can bring us to the space where we begin to acknowledge this physicality. Paying attention will keep you in tune with your body, which is essential if you’re trying to go hands free. Listen to the full podcast for a guide.
Set the mood
As always, it’s important to set the mood. This means lighting candles and putting on soft tunes that make you feel sexy (maybe some Drake, Beyoncé, or The Weekend).
Close your eyes and take a deep breath in and exhale three times to relax and decompress. Think of someone, something that you find attractive.
Take another three breaths in slowly (Liz suggests sipping air in through an imaginary straw on the podcast) while engaging your pelvic floor (this can be done by sitting in a chair and squeezing your lower stomach muscles). Each time you breathe in, pay attention to how it makes your body feel, particularly your genitals. The simple act of awareness can change the way your body feels and can allow you tap into your body
Keep breathing in and out and try rocking your hips while contracting your pelvic muscles.
While the word is in the name, try not to make a hands free orgasm the goal of your practice. While it’s a fun treat, try just experimenting without any pressure for an end result. Practice makes perfect, here, so you might not experience fireworks on your first try. Be patient with yourself, and feel free to use your hands if you want to (more on that here).
Have patience and, of course, have fun!
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